Tell me what you think guys this is the plans for a new book. I have ceased work on the old book for now. This seems more promising, I would love love some feedback.
A rusy boxcar sat on a lonely unused track, sounds of nature were handicapped by the thundering roar of a nearby train barrelling over the joints of its steel pathway. The boxcar seemed dead and lifeless in the Kansas dusk but inside life breathed for the first time. A father and two little girls witnessed their mother give birth to a frail brown baby.
Born in an abandoned boxcar on a beautiful March evening in Kansas City. Felicitas DelaCruz was the third daughter Eduardo and Teresa, mexican immigrants seeking a new life in the United States. With the violence brewing in Mexico under the influence of Pancho Villa's rebellion.
Felicitas cried as babies do when brought into this world. Her brown skin glowing red with each exhaled scream. Teresa would never hear her daughter's cry for she was deaf but she looked on the tiny life with love, holding tight to the creation that god had bestowed upon her and she smiled. She didn't need to hear the cries to know this baby though rather petite would be a strong woman in this country.
Now that I've written it I am unsure how it sounds. Needs work. But feedback nonetheless is good.
2 comments:
Interesting madam, interesting. So will it be fictional with only some similarities of the past, or more of a biography?
I like it :)
Post a Comment